During the lesson, the information for you to know is written in regular type, and what we suggest speaking or reading aloud to children is in bold. All resources for this lesson, including the Teacher Guide, Student Page, Family Connection Card, and other resources can be downloaded in a ZIP file by clicking on the following link:
In some lessons you will find "resource articles." These are articles written by experts from around the world to help equip you for your work with children and adolescents. Share them with parents or guardians if you consider it appropriate.
Human anger doesn’t produce the holy life God wants.
James 1:20
Anger can bubble up in us like a pot of boiling soup. Just as the boiling soup can splatter and boil over, creating a mess, anger can also spill over and create a mess in our lives. Pause for a moment and think about something that makes you angry. Is it injustice or the pain of others? Or is it because something did not go as you wanted? There are many sources of anger—some healthy and some unhealthy, some God-honoring and some sinful.
How do you deal with anger? Do you let it boil over and get out of control? How do you think God would want you to deal with your anger? Anger is a secondary response because of pain, fear, sadness, or other primary emotions. It can be very difficult to keep anger under control, but it is important to come to God with your concerns and fears. When you feel out of control, stop, pray, and ask God to help you deal with your anger in healthy and God-honoring ways. Anger that lashes out with cruel words does not honor God. Anger that becomes physical does not honor God. Thank God for creating emotions, but do not be afraid to come to Him for help with your anger.
Encourage families to talk about what anger looks like. Have children talk about the warning signs of anger they learned today.
Teacher Tip: If possible, email or text the Family Connection Card to the families of your students.
Welcome the children as they come to class. Ask each child to give you his best roar as he enters, and then sit in a circle.
As you entered, I asked you to roar. Today, we will talk about anger. Sometimes, when we are angry, we sound like roaring animals. On the count of 3, I want everyone to roar loudly. When I raise my hand, I want you to be as quiet as you can. Are you ready? 1, 2, 3, roar!
Raise your hand after about 10 seconds to signal the children to stop roaring.
Wow! Those were some amazing roars! You sounded like animals! Do you ever feel like your anger makes you become a roaring animal? Animals do not stop to think about what they will or will not do. Animals live mostly on what is called instinct. If they want to do something, they do it.
One of the many differences between animals and people is that people can control the way they act. Let me show you what I mean. Make a face that shows you are angry (pause). Those are some angry faces! Okay, so you are angry—what will you do with your anger?
When you are angry, it affects your body. You may get red in the face. Your heart may beat faster. You may breathe heavily or clench your teeth. Show me what you do when you are angry. Please do not to touch anyone as you show me what it looks like to be angry.
Allow the children to show you what their anger looks like for about 30 seconds. Then, raise your hand to signal them to stop their actions and become quiet.
Did you see that all of you could stop when I asked you to? That is the difference between people and animals. People can control themselves and their anger. God gave us the ability to stop and not hurt others. This does not mean that it is easy to control your anger, though. One of the things people do when they get angry is to stomp their feet. Have you ever stomped your feet when you were angry?
We will play a game to help us answer a question about anger. Stand up. We will go around the circle and count each child. When it is your turn to be counted, you will stomp your foot. I will stop after we have counted 7 children. When we stop, the last child we counted will answer this question.
Count the children in the circle. When you get to the 7th child, ask him the question. Repeat this process 3 times, allowing 3 different children to answer.
Anger can make us feel horrible! What we do with anger can make us feel even worse. When you recognize anger, you can do what God gave you the ability to do—control how you respond.
Did you know that there is healthy and unhealthy anger? God created all of our emotions, including anger. Anger is the emotion you feel when something happens that you do not like or that is not right. Anger is a signal that your deep emotions like fear, sadness, and pain are getting very strong. It is important to figure out why you are angry. Sometimes people do things that hurt your body. Sometimes people do things that make you sad—this hurts your emotions. Sometimes you are angry because of what is happening to someone else.
Let me give you some examples of different types of anger. When you are angry because you did not get what you wanted and someone hurt your emotions, this is unhealthy, sinful anger. You may also feel anger when someone embarrasses you.
However, if you are angry because someone is doing something wrong to you or someone else, you are feeling healthy anger. God created us to get angry when someone is treated poorly. God gets angry when people hurt others too. Does that surprise you? Listen to what the Bible tells us about God’s anger.
Read this verse directly from your Bible.
He said, “I am the Lord, the Lord. I am the God who is tender and kind. I am gracious. I am slow to get angry. I am faithful and full of love.”
Exodus 34:6b
God tells us He gets angry, but slowly. The Bible tells us that God gets angry when people hurt each other or choose to go against who He created them to be and how He created them to live. It is important for us to recognize the difference between healthy and unhealthy anger. We always need to control our anger, even if it is healthy anger.
Today, you will learn what anger looks, feels, and sounds like.
Optional: If you have a bottle of carbonated drink, take the children outside to demonstrate what happens if it is shaken and then opened. Follow the steps below, showing how the drink is like explosive anger. If you do not have a carbonated drink, simply have the children pretend they are shaking one instead.
Pretend you are shaking a bottle of carbonated drink with me. Shake it up really well! Inside the bottle, the shaking creates more and more bubbles. When we continue to hold on to our anger, it builds up inside of us like the bubbles inside your bottle of carbonated drink.
Allow 1–2 children to respond.
Let’s find out. Pretend to open your bottles. Wow! The drink exploded and sprayed all over! What a mess!
The shaken bottle of carbonated drink can teach you a lesson. You have to be careful about letting anger build up. You need to know how to control it or it will explode. When your anger explodes, you may hurt other people’s feelings. You may hurt them physically. You may break things. You could even hurt yourself. When anger explodes, it affects other people and it makes a mess!
If a bottle of carbonated drink has been shaken, the best thing to do is let the bottle sit for a while. It needs to settle down. The same is true when you get angry. The Bible says that you need to turn away from your anger and calm down.
Turn away from anger and don’t give in to wrath. Don’t be upset, because that only leads to evil.
Psalm 37:8
This verse says that when we are upset or angry, then it leads to evil. That is not good, is it? But we are also left with another problem. We made a really big mess when we opened our bottles. When you make a mess, you should clean it up, right?
Allow 2–3 children to respond to each of the following questions.
Allow 2 children to answer.
Allow 3 children to share their thoughts.
When your anger explodes, you need to clean up the mess that it makes. You may have to say you are sorry to God and those you hurt. You may have to work to become friends again with someone. You may have to do something to try to fix the problems that were caused by your anger. And sometimes, you cannot fix them.
Every time you feel anger bubbling up, pause and listen to your body’s warning signs. Your response should be as the Bible says: Turn away from what could cause you to explode. Let’s play a game to learn what some of the warning signs are for anger.
If possible, go outside to do this activity. If that is not possible, clear a large space of all obstacles. Have the children stand at 1 end of the cleared space. Choose an object for children to run to such as a tree or a wall in a room. Then, explain the game to the children.
I will shout out examples of the warning signs of anger. When you hear the warning sign, repeat it back to me. I will then say, “What will you do?” You will say, “I turn away from anger!” Then, run to the (object you chose). Then you will return to the starting place.
Let’s try this together. When I am angry, I bite my lip. Repeat it with me: “I bite my lip.” What will you do? Say it with me: “I turn away from anger.” Run to the (object you chose). Great job! Let’s try a few more examples.
When I am angry, I make a fist.
Children will say, “I make a fist.” Then they will say with you, “I turn away from anger” as they run to the object again. Then they will return to the starting point.
When I am angry, my face feels hot.
When I am angry, my heart beats faster.
When I am angry, I bite down hard with my teeth.
When I am angry, I breathe faster.
Good job! Everyone can sit down now.
Anger is your response to something that you feel is not right. For example, you do not like it when someone says something mean to you, so you get angry. Or you do not like it when you struggle to do something, so you get angry. Or maybe you do not like being wrong, so you get angry. Maybe you get angry when someone hurts you deeply.
In this life, you will get angry. It is okay to feel angry. Remember, it is not okay to hurt others or yourself because you are angry. Listening to the warning signs your body gives you will help you control your anger.
Most importantly, when you are angry, you can go to God. He cares about what is making you angry. He can show you if your anger is healthy or unhealthy. He can heal your heart from sadness or hurt and help you control your anger.
Optional: If you are using Student Pages, have the children do the drawing activity on them. Give them 2 minutes to practice switching their angry responses to peaceful ones.
We will practice recognizing warning signs of anger. I will read a situation and you will listen for the signs that someone is angry. Then, tell me whether the person is feeling healthy or unhealthy anger.
Situation 1: Obed’s father yelled at him for not shutting the gate. One of the animals got out. He thought his father would never stop yelling. Obed had not been around the animals that day, so it could not have been him, but he was too scared to say anything. He started breathing faster and bit his lip.
Obed’s father. Some children may also mention Obed because he bit his lip and his breathing changed.
He yelled at Obed.
His anger was unhealthy because it was out of control.
Situation 2: Nakimera saw an angry man beating an old man beside the road with a cane. Her face felt hot and her eyes filled with tears. The old man begged for the beating to stop as he said, “I’m sorry.” Nakimera felt her heart beating faster. She wanted the beating of the old man to stop.
Nakimera was angry. The man who was beating the old man with a rod was also angry.
Her face felt hot and her heart beat faster.
Her anger was healthy. She saw someone being hurt and wanted to help him.
Optional, if there is time:
This next example will be difficult to figure out.
Situation 3: A boy reached over and stole half of Amos’ lunch. Amos felt his hand tighten into a fist as he thought about what he would do to the boy. Amos stood up and bit down hard with his teeth as his heart beat quickly inside his chest.
He made a fist with his hand, clenched his teeth, and his heart beat faster.
What the other boy did was wrong. You should not take what belongs to others. Amos’ anger was healthy. However, he should not let his anger get out of control.
Sometimes you can feel angry for a reason that is healthy, but your response to the anger can be unhealthy. If Amos had hurt the other boy, his anger would have been out of control and wrong. The Bible says not to let this happen.
End of Option
Listen and watch for the warning signs that you are getting angry. Let those warning signs help you decide if you are experiencing a good anger or the wrong kind of anger. Remember to turn away from anger.
If you are using it, show the children the Memory Verse poster as you read the verse from the Bible.
Don’t become angry quickly. Anger lives in the hearts of foolish people.
Ecclesiastes 7:9
Do the following actions as you read the memory verse with the children.
Don’t (do not)—Indicate no with your body.
Become angry quickly—Stomp your feet.
Anger—Stomp your feet.
Lives in the hearts—Put the palms of your hands against the middle of your chest.
Of foolish people—Frown and look down.
End class by saying this blessing, based on Psalm 37:8, over the children.
Blessing: May God help you turn away from what makes you angry when you feel your anger get out of control. May you do what is good and pleasing to God.
Share the worship song for this quarter with your children if possible.
Life on Life ©2020 David C Cook. Reproducible for home or classroom use only. All other uses require written permission from David C Cook [email protected]. All rights reserved.
