During the lesson, the information for you to know is written in regular type, and what we suggest speaking or reading aloud to children is in bold. All resources for this lesson, including the Teacher Guide, Student Page, Family Connection Card, and other resources can be downloaded in a ZIP file by clicking on the following link:
In some lessons you will find "resource articles." These are articles written by experts from around the world to help equip you for your work with children and adolescents. Share them with parents or guardians if you consider it appropriate.
Trouble is all around me, but you keep me alive. You reach out your hand to put a stop to the anger of my enemies. With your powerful right hand you save me.
Psalm 138:7
Where do you feel safe? Perhaps you have a place you like to go where you know no one will disturb you. Maybe the church is your place of refuge. Wherever you go that makes you feel safe, know that God is there with you. In fact, God is always with you, whether you are in a safe place or a difficult place. When you call out to Him, He will meet you there.
Not only is God with you in times of trouble, He involves Himself in it, extending His hand to put a stop to the anger of your enemies. Do you feel His presence? When others around you are angry and aggressive, you can call out to Him! Know that no matter what happens here on earth, God cares about you and will protect you. Remember as you teach today that many of the children in your care are looking for a safe place. You can be a safe place for them and introduce them to the one true safe place—God.
Encourage families to listen to their children when they tell them what can be done when they encounter an angry person. The steps they learned are valuable to both children and adults.
Teacher Tip: If possible, email or text the Family Connection Card to the families of your students.
Welcome the children to class. Ask your children to sit in pairs. If necessary, you can have 1 group of 3 children.
The last time we met, we talked about what anger looks like. Seeing emotions on the outside helps us to understand what is happening on the inside of a person. A person who is sad may look down at the ground as his eyes fill with tears. A person who is excited may not be able to sit still for very long and her voice may get higher.
Allow 2 minutes for children to respond. Walk around and observe the children’s responses.
You all came up with very good examples of what anger looks like! Let’s talk some more about what anger looks like. To do this, we will play a yes and no game. I need 6 volunteers to come and stand by me. Raise your hand if you want to act.
Choose 6 volunteers to stand in a line beside you and face the class.
I will whisper an action in the first volunteer’s ear. He will act out what I told him. He cannot use any words. The rest of you will decide if what he acted showed anger or not. Say “yes” if it showed anger and “no” if it did not show anger.
Whisper the first action below to a child. He will act out what you tell him while the other students call out “yes” or “no.” Once the children have called out their responses, tell them the correct answer, which is in parentheses. Repeat this activity with a different volunteer acting out each action on the list.
Bite down hard with your teeth. (Yes)
Fold your hands together in front of you with your arms hanging down. (No)
Make a fist with your hands. (Yes)
Squint your eyes and make a frown with your mouth. (Yes)
Breathe calmly. (No)
Pick up something and smack it down with force. (Yes)
Have the volunteers sit down with their partners when they are done.
Nice work guessing which actions showed anger and which did not! Knowing what an angry person looks like will help you to deal with someone who is angry. Today, you will learn more about dealing with angry people.
Today, you will hear about a group of people who responded to many angry people around them. As I read the story, I will ask you questions about how you would deal with the angry people. Talk with your partners about your responses. Here is the true Bible story about the rebuilding of Jerusalem’s wall.
The city of Jerusalem was home to God’s people, the Israelites. Back in those days, cities had walls around them to protect the people from their enemies. The wall around Jerusalem was broken by their enemies, the Babylonians. The Babylonians destroyed the wall around Jerusalem, captured God’s people, and took them away to the land of Babylon.
When the Israelites returned to Jerusalem many years later, there was no wall to protect them from their enemies. Nehemiah was a leader who returned with the people and led them to rebuild the wall.
Tobiah and Sanballat were enemies of Nehemiah and God’s people. When they found out that the Israelites were rebuilding the wall, they both became angry and said mean things to Nehemiah and the Israelites. Listen to what they said:
Read this verse directly from your Bible.
Tobiah from Ammon was at Sanballat’s side. He said, “What are they building? They’re putting up a stone wall. But suppose a fox climbs on top of it. Even that will break it down!”
Nehemiah 4:3
Allow 1 minute for children to respond.
You should stay calm. When someone is angry, he is not calm. His voice may get louder. His actions may get violent. Inside, you may be shaking. Act calm even if you are not calm inside. To calm yourself down, you can:
1. Pray and ask God to help you remain calm. Remember He cares for you and is with you!
2. Take a deep breath. Slow down your breathing. When you are scared, your breathing gets faster and you cannot think very well.
3. Lower your voice. As the angry person’s voice gets louder, make your voice softer. This will help you calm yourself and may also help the angry person calm down.
Listen to this verse:
A gentle answer turns anger away. But mean words stir up anger.
Proverbs 15:1
You will practice calming down in a moment. When dealing with angry people, it is easy to become angry also. Do not respond by yelling back at the person. It is very easy to yell back at someone who is yelling at you. Nehemiah could have easily yelled back at Tobiah and Sanballat, but he did not. Instead, he focused on his work.
Sanballat and Tobiah continued to say hurtful things about the Israelites rebuilding the wall. The Israelites continued to build, though. When other nations heard about the Jews repairing the wall, they became very angry because they did not want the wall to be fixed. The angry people made plans to attack Jerusalem and stop the work on the wall.
Let’s pause for a moment and pretend we are the Israelites. People all around us are very angry! I would personally begin to feel angry at my enemies for trying to stop me from living in my homeland.
Look for children to pretend to pray, take deep breaths in and out, and speak calmly. Demonstrate these methods if the children do not show them all.
Nehemiah led the Israelites to pray for God’s help. They also guarded the wall day and night to watch for any enemies who might try to come in and hurt them. Listen to what Nehemiah said to the people about their enemies.
If possible, show The Action Bible image to the children as you read the verse.
I looked things over. Then I stood up and spoke to the nobles, the officials and the rest of the people. I said, “Don’t be afraid of your enemies. Remember the Lord. He is great and powerful. So fight for your families. Fight for your sons and daughters. Fight for your wives and homes.”
Nehemiah 4:14
Nehemiah reminded the people that God is very powerful! He instructed the people of Israel to fight to protect themselves. Do you know what happened next? The enemies heard about this and it scared them! So the people building the wall did not need to fight.
When you are afraid of angry people, talk to God about your fears. He listens! When you call on God for help, He calms you down. Ask God to help you know how to deal with the angry person.
Let’s practice praying. Praying is just like talking to a person who is in front of you, only the person you are talking to is God. You can start by saying, “Dear God.” Then tell God what you need. For example, you might say: “Dear God, please help me to deal with this angry person. Please do not let her hurt me or anyone around me. Thank You for listening to me. In Jesus’ name, amen.”
Allow 2 minutes for partners to discuss their responses. Then, allow 2–3 children to share what they might pray.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts about what you might pray when someone is angry with you. In our story, God protected the Israelites from those who were angry with them. The people worked harder building the wall. They could live safely in Jerusalem with the wall—and God—protecting them.
A few weeks ago, you learned that Father God protects His people. The story of Nehemiah tells us about God’s protection. Many people were angry with the Israelites and did not want them to rebuild their wall. These enemies wanted the Israelites to live without protection. This was not God’s plan for them. God protected His people from those who were angry and wanted to hurt them. The Bible says:
Trouble is all around me, but you keep me alive. You reach out your hand to put a stop to the anger of my enemies. With your powerful right hand you save me.
Psalm 138:7
When you are around someone who is very angry, it is important to try to stay safe. God wants you to be safe! You also need to find a safe place. Many times, angry people will hit and hurt. You need to do everything you can to keep yourself safe when this happens.
Sometimes when people are angry, they want to start fights. If you do not join the fight, the angry person might not know what to do. If an angry person comes toward you and looks like he might hurt you, do your best to get away from the angry person.
If possible, go to a safe place and a safe adult. Tell the safe adult the truth about what happened. Do not lie about anything. Tell the adult why you are afraid. If you have someone in your life who gets angry all the time, talk with a safe adult about what you will do the next time you feel in danger—where you will go and who you will talk to.
Allow children 1 minute to discuss each of the following questions with their partners.
It may be difficult to tell a safe adult about the angry person if the angry person is someone close to you. It is not your fault his anger is out of control. Do not be ashamed or afraid to tell someone. It is much more important for you to be safe. You may not want to tell about the angry person, because you think it may get him in trouble. It is more important for you to be safe. It may be difficult to tell someone about the angry person because you are afraid it will make him angrier. Keep yourself safe and tell someone!
We have talked about several things you can do if you are with an angry person. You should take a deep breath, lower your voice, not get angry or yell back, and pray. You may have to walk away from the person. Go to a safe place and a safe adult. We will practice how to respond to angry people by playing the Safe from Anger game.
Create a path in your teaching space using rocks and the picture cards from the end of the lesson. Place 4 rocks and then card 1. The rocks and cards need to be about 1 step apart from each other. Place the next 4 rocks and card 2. Continue with cards 3 and 4. After card 4, place 4 more rocks and then create a “safe house” using the 4 sticks. Put the children in groups of 4–5. Have the children stand at the beginning of the path.
Each group will move along this path. Each rock or picture is 1 step. I will draw a number card from this stack and call out the number to the first group. That group will move that number of steps. Each group will get a turn to move before the first group moves again. If your group lands on a picture, you will act out that response to an angry person. Each group must make it to the safe place. When your group reaches the safe place, you can sit quietly or cheer for the other groups that are still playing.
As the groups land on pictures, you may need to explain to them what the pictures mean. Below is a list that matches the numbers on the picture squares.
1. Breathe and calm down
2. Lower your voice
3. Do not yell or show anger
4. Pray
Optional: If you are using Student Pages, play the Safe from Anger game. Give each child a small object to use. Put students in groups of 2–4 children and give them 7 minutes to play the game. Instructions are on the Student Pages.
You all did a wonderful job of acting out what to do when you are dealing with an angry person! Do not forget what happened at the end of the game. You landed on a safe place. It is always important to keep yourself safe! Our memory verse today talks about our own responses to anger.
Don’t become angry quickly. Anger lives in the hearts of foolish people.
Ecclesiastes 7:9
Do the following actions as you read the memory verse with the children.
Don’t (do not)—Indicate no with your body.
Become angry quickly—Stomp your feet.
Anger—Stomp your feet.
Lives in the hearts—Put the palms of your hands against the middle of your chest.
Of foolish people—Frown and look down.
End class by saying this blessing, based on Psalm 138:7, over the children.
Blessing: May you reach out to God when you feel like trouble is all around you. May you feel God reaching out to keep you safe.
Share the worship song for this quarter with your children if possible.
Life on Life ©2020 David C Cook. Reproducible for home or classroom use only. All other uses require written permission from David C Cook [email protected]. All rights reserved.
