During the lesson, the information for you to know is written in regular type, and what we suggest speaking or reading aloud to children is in bold. All resources for this lesson, including the Teacher Guide and Student Page, can be downloaded in a ZIP file by clicking on the following link:
In some lessons you will find "resource articles." These are articles written by experts from around the world to help equip you for your work with children and adolescents. Share them with parents or guardians if you consider it appropriate.
Even if you had ten thousand guardians in Christ, you do not have many fathers, for in Christ Jesus I became your father through the gospel. Therefore I urge you to imitate me.
1 Corinthians 4:15–16
We naturally look to those around us who seem wiser, more experienced, and more mature in their faith when we need help with a difficult situation or discover an area in our lives where we need to learn and improve. The members of the early church looked to Paul, who through his ministry to others and his extensive writings in the New Testament showed all of us how to live out our faith. He invested in the lives of others to help them to grow as leaders and learn to share Jesus’ message with the world. And, he encouraged others to do the same.
You may not feel well equipped to be a mentor, but you serve as an example for others, whether you intend to or not. So imitate Paul by investing your wisdom, experience, and care into the lives of others to help them to learn and grow, and look for others who will encourage you to improve. When you walk alongside others as a mentor, you can build them up and help them to grow. And when you reflect Jesus to those you mentor, you can encourage them to become imitators not just of you but of Christ.
Encourage teens to ask their family members, “Who has had the most positive impact on your life? Whose life do you think you have influenced in a positive way?” They can then share about the value of mentoring others.
Teacher Tip: If possible, email or text the Family Connection Card to the families of your students.
Greet the teens by name and ask them, “Who do you think knows you best?” Invite a few students to share their thoughts with the whole group.
Divide the class into groups of 4–5. Explain that you will give each group a question. Students should take turns sharing so that every person who wants to share gets a chance.
Read the questions aloud. As you read each question, assign it to 1 of the groups. If you have a large class, give the same question to more than 1 group.
Give the groups 4–5 minutes to discuss their questions. Then gather the class together. Have 1 student from each group repeat the group’s question and share 1 of their answers with the whole class.
What do all of these questions have in common?
Allow 2–3 students to share their thoughts.
All of these questions are about our relationships with others, particularly those who help us to learn and grow. God often brings people into our lives who can help us to grow as people and grow closer to Him. When this is done in an intentional way, it is called mentoring. A mentor is a wise and trusted counsellor or teacher. A mentor is usually (though not always) older and more experienced than the person she is mentoring. But a mentor is not the same as a school or church teacher. “Mentoring” means teaching or training in a one-on-one relationship. Today we will learn more about becoming good mentors.
Have a student read 1 Peter 4:10 aloud from the Bible. If that is not possible, the verse is printed here.
Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others, as faithful stewards of God’s grace in its various forms.
1 Peter 4:10
Though this verse is not specifically about mentoring, what can we learn from it that can help us to understand mentoring?
Mentoring is a way to serve others. We have talked in past lessons about what it means to be wise stewards, or managers, of our gifts. Mentoring is a way to use our gifts to help others. A mentor invests time, wisdom, and care into another person to help that person to learn and grow. The goal of mentoring is for the person being mentored to become grown-up and mature so she can begin to mentor others. For Christians who are helping others to grow in faith, this is called discipleship.
God has given you many gifts to help you to be a good mentor. For example, you have the gift of life experience—you have lived more years and had more experiences than someone who is younger than you are. You also have the gifts of time, the capacity to care, and good ideas and wisdom. When you use these gifts to help someone else, you are being a good steward of the blessings God has given you.
Is there someone you might consider a mentor? What have you learned from this person?
Though the word “mentor” does not appear in the Bible, we can see people mentoring and discipling others throughout the Old and New Testaments. Let’s talk about 1 of those mentoring relationships in the Bible.
For many years, Paul was an important leader in the early church. He travelled all over the world preaching and teaching about Jesus. Paul understood that it was important for him to teach others how to continue to share Jesus’ teaching. So, Paul brought a young man named Timothy with him when he travelled. Paul intentionally invested time, wisdom, and care into Timothy. Eventually Timothy matured and was able to share Jesus’ message with others on his own. Timothy continued the important work of telling others about Jesus even after Paul died. Let’s see what we learn from Paul about how to become a good mentor.
First, a good mentor is committed to the mentoring relationship. Listen to what the Bible tells us about how Paul and Timothy first began traveling together.
Paul came to Derbe and then to Lystra, where a disciple named Timothy lived, whose mother was Jewish and a believer but whose father was a Greek. The believers at Lystra and Iconium spoke well of him. Paul wanted to take him along on the journey, so he circumcised him because of the Jews who lived in that area, for they all knew that his father was a Greek.
Acts 16:1–3
What does this passage tell us about how and why Paul began mentoring Timothy?
Allow 2–3 students to share their thoughts.
Paul invested his time in teaching and developing a friendship with Timothy. Paul also recognized Timothy’s gifts and invited Timothy to participate in his work. Paul was intentional as he began the mentoring relationship.
So how can you establish an intentional and committed mentoring relationship? The best way is to begin by establishing trust. Schedule regular meeting times and arrive at the meetings prepared. This will show the person you are mentoring that you are committed to being a good mentor. It also shows that you care about the person you are mentoring, that you believe mentoring is valuable, and that you are committed to the relationship.
Turn to someone sitting near you. Discuss this question together:
Imagine you are mentoring someone. Other than what we have already discussed, what is 1 practical thing you can do to show that you are committed to the relationship?
Give the teens 2–3 minutes to share their ideas with their partners. Then allow 2–3 students to share their ideas with the whole class.
A good mentor is caring and honest. Paul shared his knowledge with Timothy as they worked and travelled together. He also wrote letters to guide Timothy as he learned and grew. Listen to how Paul addressed one of these letters. This letter is part of the New Testament of the Bible.
To Timothy my true son in the faith: Grace, mercy and peace from God the Father and Christ Jesus our Lord.
1 Timothy 1:2
What does this verse tell us about how Paul felt about Timothy?
Allow 2–3 students to share their thoughts. Then guide the students to understand that Paul thought of Timothy as he would a son and he wanted good things for Timothy. This shows that he cared deeply for Timothy.
In this letter, Paul was also honest with Timothy. He shared ways that Timothy could grow in his faith and his skills.
For this reason I remind you to fan into flame the gift of God, which is in you through the laying on of my hands. For the Spirit God gave us does not make us timid, but gives us power, love and self-discipline.
2 Timothy 1:6–7
What does this verse tell us about the kind of guidance Paul gave to Timothy?
Allow 2–3 students to share their ideas. Then guide the students to understand that Paul encouraged Timothy to continue to grow in faith and reminded Timothy of the time and care he had invested in Timothy’s training. Paul also reminded Timothy not to be timid but to share boldly. This shows that Paul was sincere in the ways he encouraged Timothy to learn and grow.
So how can you become a caring and honest mentor? A good mentor cares about the person she is mentoring. Because of this, she is honest, even when it is difficult. And being honest and caring also builds trust!
Turn to someone sitting next to you and discuss this question:
Do you think it is important to be honest with the people you care about? Why or why not? Give examples from your life.
Give the students 2–3 minutes to discuss their thoughts with their partners. Then gather the class together and ask 2–3 teens to share their thoughts with the whole class.
A good mentor sets a positive example. Paul set a positive example for Timothy in his life and his work. In fact, in his letters to Timothy, he reminds Timothy often of his example and encourages Timothy to follow it. Listen to one of those passages.
You, however, know all about my teaching, my way of life, my purpose, faith, patience, love, endurance.
2 Timothy 3:10
What does this tell us about the kind of example Paul set for Timothy? How did Timothy respond to Paul’s example?
Allow 2–3 students to share their thoughts. Then guide them to understand that Paul set an example for Timothy through his teaching, his behaviour, his purpose, his faith, and his character. Timothy responded by following his example.
So how can you set a positive example as a mentor? Mentors should set an example in the ways they think and behave to show others a good example. Mentors should try to make wise choices and live lives that honour God and show care and concern for others. But we all make mistakes and unwise choices sometimes. It can be difficult to help someone to learn and grow in areas where we often make poor decisions. In these situations, we should be honest and ask for forgiveness. Good mentors are not perfect, but they do show that they have strong character and take responsibility when they do make mistakes. This helps to build trust as well.
Turn to someone sitting next to you and share your answers to these questions:
Give the students 2–3 minutes to talk with their partners. Then gather the class together and ask 2–3 teens to share their thoughts with the whole class.
A good mentor is also a good communicator. Paul showed this in the letters he wrote to Timothy. He was able to share his thoughts, his concerns, and his encouragement in honest and caring ways. He also responded to Timothy’s concerns in caring ways.
What are some ways to be a good communicator?
Allow 2–3 students to share their ideas. Then guide them to understand that good communicators give encouragement, share helpful criticism, and listen well.
Encouragement is an important part of good communication. Sharing honest advice and correction is important, too. Both of these can help a person being mentored to learn and grow in skill and confidence. It is also important to celebrate the accomplishments of the person being mentored. Encouragement shows others that you honour them and helps to build trust.
Turn to someone near you and talk about the following question:
Think of a time someone encouraged you. What did that person say? What impact did the encouraging words have on you?
Give the students 2–3 minutes to share their ideas with their partners. Then allow 2–3 students to share their thoughts with the whole class.
Listening is an important part of good communication. Listening well shows the other person that you care about what he has to say. It also helps you to gather information about the other person, so you can understand the person’s needs. This will help you to become a better mentor.
Eventually Timothy became Paul’s ministry partner. (That is the goal of mentoring—for the student to be able to do what he has learned without the help of his mentor.)
Optional:
If you have time, do this activity to demonstrate the importance of active listening in a mentoring relationship.
Ask for 2 volunteers. Explain that the first teen will pretend to be a mentor and the other will pretend to be the person being mentored. The teen pretending to be mentored should choose a topic to discuss with her pretend mentor, such as her family, school, or favourite activity. As the student talks, the mentor should not be an active listener. She might look the other way, talk over her, and act disinterested. After about 30 seconds, ask the student:
How did you feel as you talked to your mentor? Why?
Do the activity again with the same 2 volunteers. This time, the mentor should show in appropriate ways that he or she is listening well. Some ideas include nodding, making eye contact, and asking relevant questions.
How did you feel this time as you talked to your mentor? Why?
End of Option
What are some characteristics of a good mentor?
Give students a chance to share what they remember from the lesson. Mention any of these 4 characteristics that students do not answer: a good mentor is committed to the relationship, is caring and honest, sets a good example, and is a good communicator.
Sometimes mentoring relationships happen naturally. Maybe there is a younger child in your neighbourhood or church who admires you and wants to be like you. He may want to spend time with you. Maybe you are already investing your time, wisdom, and care into him as a mentor.
Often mentoring relationships are something that you must start with purpose. In the case of Paul and Timothy, Paul intentionally picked Timothy up to travel with him. Paul intentionally invested in Timothy for many years.
Think about the younger people you know. Is there a Timothy in your life—someone younger than you whom you want to invest your time, wisdom, and care into?
Give students time to think quietly.
If you have someone in mind and want to begin a mentoring relationship with that person, raise your hand for several seconds. If you do not know anyone or do not feel ready to be a mentor, that is okay. You can still participate in this activity.
Pause for students to raise, then lower, their hands. This will help you know which of your students are planning to start mentoring. If possible, follow up with them after class. Ask them who they want to mentor and what steps they will take to begin.
If you are using the Memory Verse Poster, show it to the students.
You then, my son, be strong in the grace that is in Christ Jesus. And the things you have heard me say in the presence of many witnesses entrust to reliable people who will also be qualified to teach others.
2 Timothy 2:1–2
Here are some important steps to begin a mentoring relationship:
Find a mentor to help you. If you are going to help someone else to learn and grow, it is important for you to learn and grow as well. Find a trusted person who sets a good example and is a good communicator. Invite that person to assist, advise, and pray for you. Ask your mentor to hold you accountable and encourage you. If possible, meet regularly with your mentor.
Talk to the person you want to mentor. Explain what a mentor is, and tell her you would like to mentor her, if she is willing. Do not pressure her. It is okay if she says no or is not ready.
If it is possible and appropriate, talk to this person’s parent, teacher, or older relative. Explain what mentoring is and why you would like to mentor the child. Respectfully ask for permission.
Set up a regular time to meet with the person you are mentoring. This could be at a time when you often see him, such as while walking home from school.
Begin by getting to know more about the person you are mentoring. At your first meeting, ask questions about family, school, life, and likes and dislikes. This will help you to build trust and get to know the person you are mentoring.
Have the students discuss the following questions with a partner.
Optional: If you have paper and pencils, give them to the students so they can write their answers to the following. If you are using the Student Pages, the students can use these to write their answers.
Give the teens 4–5 minutes to talk with their partners about their answers. Then close with a blessing based on 2 Timothy 2:2:
Blessing: May you find your source of strength, wisdom, and discipline in Jesus as you learn to lead others well. And may you share what you have learned with others so that they may continue to learn and grow in faith and ability.
Lead the teens in singing this quarter’s song, if possible.
Life on Life ©2020 David C Cook. Reproducible for home or classroom use only. All other uses require written permission from David C Cook [email protected]. All rights reserved.
