During the lesson, the information for you to know is written in regular type, and what we suggest speaking or reading aloud to children is in bold. All resources for this lesson, including the Teacher Guide, Student Page, Family Connection Card, and other resources can be downloaded in a ZIP file by clicking on the following link:
In some lessons you will find "resource articles." These are articles written by experts from around the world to help equip you for your work with children and adolescents. Share them with parents or guardians if you consider it appropriate.
God gave us his Spirit. And the Spirit doesn’t make us weak and fearful. Instead, the Spirit gives us power and love. He helps us control ourselves.
2 Timothy 1:7
Self-control can be a lifelong struggle. As believers, we know that we are called to live as Jesus did, so we commit ourselves to choosing self-control. But sometimes we may conquer a bad habit or overcome a wrong attitude only to uncover another weakness or sinful desire. We begin to struggle all over again. Through this process, we forget that we cannot overcome sin alone. Instead, we need to give control to the One who created us. He knows each of our flaws. Because of His love for us, He has promised to help us to overcome our weakness and sin.
Think about an aspect of your life that causes you to struggle with self-control. Next, pray and ask the Holy Spirit to show you a way you can choose self-control. Now close your eyes, take a deep breath, and give it to God. Let the Giver of power, love, and self-control help you to honour Him in this area of weakness. Let God be your strength!
Encourage families to practice stopping and calming down together. Have the children share how to take deep breaths to calm down. Explain to families that calming down can help children to act with more self-control.
Teacher Tip: If possible, email or text the Family Connection Card to the families of your students.
Greet the children as they arrive. Think of a simple joke or appropriate funny story to share with them. Ask them to sit in groups of 4–5 children. Before beginning the lesson, be sure every child is in a group.
Let’s play a game. In a moment, you will all have an opportunity to make someone laugh! Each group will choose 1 person to be the “serious child.” This child will do everything she can not to laugh.
Allow a few seconds for the children to decide who the “serious child” will be. Then ask the “serious child” from each group to raise a hand.
The rest of the children in your group will try to make this child laugh. You may tell a joke or funny story, do something silly, or make a face. When trying to make the “serious child” laugh, follow these rules:
Once you make the “serious child” laugh, choose another “serious child” and try to make him laugh. When you have made all the children in your group laugh, stand up. The last group to stand up wins the game!
After they make the child laugh, have the groups choose another child and try to make that child laugh. Continue until there is only 1 group sitting down. Announce this group as the winner and ask the children to sit in their normal places.
Allow 2–3 children to respond to each of the following questions.
This activity helped us to understand what it feels like to struggle to control ourselves. We tried very hard to be serious, but eventually our funny friends made us laugh. Today, we will learn about what self-control is and why it is important.
Self-control is the ability to control our behaviour and our words. Self-control may feel difficult when we experience very strong emotions, even good ones. When we are angry, frustrated, afraid, or even excited, we may feel out of control. Here are some ways our bodies change when we feel strong emotions.
We may get an upset stomach or a headache.
We may feel like we cannot sit still or be quiet.
“Self-control” is the ability to control our behaviour even when our emotions make it difficult. This is especially difficult when we experience very strong emotions, even good ones. We are not alone when we struggle to use self-control. Listen to what the Bible tells us about this:
Read this verse directly from your Bible.
God gave us his Spirit. And the Spirit doesn’t make us weak and fearful. Instead, the Spirit gives us power and love. He helps us control ourselves.
2 Timothy 1:7
The Bible tells a true story about a man who showed self-control. This man was Abraham’s son, Isaac. At that time, God had sent His people to live in a place called Gerar. God had promised to give this land to His people, and God always keeps His promises. God also promised to bless His people, and He did that, too.
One of the people God blessed was Isaac. He planted crops in Gerar, and his crops grew and grew. He raised animals, and his flocks and herds grew larger and larger. Isaac became very rich and powerful.
Isaac and his family were not the only ones who lived in Gerar. The Philistines also lived there. The Philistines became jealous of Isaac. They filled up Isaac’s wells with dirt, so he did not have water for his crops or his animals. One of the Philistines told Isaac that he had become too rich and powerful, so they told him to move away.
Isaac needed water. Without it, all of his crops and animals would die. Without water, Isaac could not stay in his home.
Isaac may have felt angry or sad, but he did not fight with the Philistines. Instead, he moved away. He found a new home in a valley nearby. He opened the wells that he found there. His servants also dug a new well in the valley.
But the people who lived in the valley became angry with Isaac. “The water is ours!” they said. So Isaac’s servants dug another new well. But the people of the valley argued with Isaac about that well, too.
Isaac may have felt frustrated and angry, but he did not fight with the Philistines. Instead, he dug another well. This time, no one argued with Isaac. Listen to what Isaac said:
Read the verses in this lesson directly from your Bible.
Now the Lord has given us room. Now we will be successful in the land.
Genesis 26:22b
God appeared to Isaac and promised again to bless him. Isaac built an altar and worshipped God. Isaac’s servants dug another well. Now Isaac had plenty of water for his crops and his animals. Isaac was blessed just as God had promised.
Later, some Philistines came to see Isaac.
Isaac asked them, “Why have you come to me? You were angry with me and sent me away.”
Genesis 26:27
The Philistines replied:
They answered, “We saw clearly that the Lord was with you. So we said, ‘There should be an agreement between us and you.’ We want to make a peace treaty with you.’”
Genesis 26:28
Isaac did not fight with the Philistines, and he did not send them away in anger. Instead, he prepared a feast for them. They ate and drank together. Then the Philistines left in a way that was peaceful.
Isaac used self-control with the Philistines. When the Philistines were angry with him, Isaac did not argue or fight. When they did things that may have hurt Isaac, he chose to be peaceful. When he could have hurt the Philistines or caused an argument with them, Isaac chose to be kind. Because Isaac used self-control, he was able to solve his problems in ways that were good for him and for others.
What might have happened if Isaac had not showed self-control?
Children may suggest that there could have been a war or an argument with the Philistines.
Because Isaac showed self-control and chose to be kind and peaceful, the Philistines chose to be peaceful. Because Isaac acted in the ways God wanted him to, the Philistines saw that Isaac was blessed by God. That brought honour to God, too!
We can choose self-control, like Isaac did. Here are some ideas to try when you need to show self-control. After I explain them to you, we will do them together.
After reading each idea, show the children what it looks like to do the action. Then ask the children to do the action with you.
Ask the children to sit in their normal places again.
Self-control is not always easy. We need to practice using it to get better at it. Let’s practice some of the ways we learned to calm down when we are feeling angry, afraid, or very excited.
Optional: If you are using the Student Pages, give the children crayons. Allow 2–3 minutes for them to draw pictures of how they can show self-control.
You all did a great job of deciding what to do to help you use self-control! Remember that we learned 1 more thing about self-control. We learned that God gives His Spirit to those who believe in Him to help them to choose self-control. Let’s learn the verse we heard earlier to remind us that we can ask God to help us with self-control.
Read the verse from your Bible.
God gave us his Spirit. And the Spirit doesn’t make us weak and fearful. Instead, the Spirit gives us power and love. He helps us control ourselves.
2 Timothy 1:7
Repeat the verse and actions for the verse 3 times.
As this Bible passage teaches us, God has given us the Holy Spirit to help us when we need to choose self-control. God helped Isaac to choose self-control, and He will help us, too! We just need to ask Him.
End class by saying this blessing, based on 2 Timothy 1:7, over the children.
Blessing: May you feel God’s Spirit in your life when you need to choose self-control. May you trust in His power and love when you need help controlling yourself.
Lead the children in singing this quarter’s song, if possible.
Life on Life ©2020 David C Cook. Reproducible for home or classroom use only. All other uses require written permission from David C Cook [email protected]. All rights reserved.
